25 Minor Milestones You Didn’t Know About

Most parents know all too well the feeling of waiting for their child to achieve the major milestones. The anxiety of wondering if your child will ever roll, sit up, talk, walk, complete and algebraic equation etc., as other babies around him all seem to be doing it. The slight tinge of jealousy that accompanies watching videos of other people’s kids on Facebook doing things that your kid can’t.

My advice? Don’t sweat it. Your child will get there in her own sweet time and worrying about it only puts undue stress on both you and her. Instead, print this handy list of lesser-known milestones, pour a fresh cup of coffee, sit back with the camera close by and be the first of your friends to post a humble-brag video of your child’s glorious achievements!

  1. First loud fart while being held by a grandparent
  2. First nappy blowout (first of many, trust me)
  3. First time you are woken by baby having an animated discussion with him/herself (this is easily the most adorable way to be woken up)
  4. First time baby stares directly at a stranger and yells (most likely the person working at the counter of the supermarket)First time someone meets your baby and doesn’t comment on his/her hair (I’m still waiting for this one)
  5. First time baby makes a bee-line for something life-threatening (power cord, pond full of sharks etc.)
  6. First time you leave baby alone in a room, then can’t find him/her upon returning ten seconds later (pro tip, check under the cot)
  7. First raspberry blown
  8. First time something recognisable as food appears in nappy
  9. First uncontrollable giggling fit
  10. First cranky face
  11. First high five/fist bump
  12. First time baby fits their whole foot in their mouth
  13. First time you manage to get more solids inside baby than on his/her bib
  14. The first time your baby makes a joke
  15. First time baby eats something off the floor
  16. First time baby eats something off the floor and you don’t rush to stop them
  17. First time your baby eats more breakfast than you do
  18. First time you have no seconds for dinner, because baby has eaten all the food
  19. First time baby uses a word for the purpose of acquiring food
  20. First time baby attempts to tackle the stairs head first
  21. First time baby looks you directly in the eye while filling his/her nappy
  22. First spectacular stack while attempting to crawl/walk
  23. First time baby dances
  24. First time your baby improvises a walker by using a piece of household furniture
  25. First time baby realises he/she can reach the dangerous objects on the bench (watch carefully for the manic smile as they reach for the scissors)
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